Brunch without alcohol is just a depressing breakfast.  

-Abraham Lincoln

 

Wise words Honest Abe.

Well, what makes brunch the ‘perfect brunch?’   If you must ask, the following ingredients will get you on your way.

  1. Mimosas

    Add vodka.  Is it a ‘screw driver’ with champagne?  Is it a mimosa with vodka?  Who knows.  Who cares.  Thank me later.

  2. Bacon

    Sorry Vegans.  Sorry 3 Little Pigs.  This is a must.  And a lot of bacon too.

  3. Bloody Marys

    Rim the glass with Old Bay, add everything else in your kitchen and some vodka.  Stir with a stick of celery.  Look classy AF.

  4. Coffee

    A solid  pick me up in between those Mimosas and Bloodies and helps with last evening’s activities.

  5. Eggs Benedict

    Second to bacon.  Calories do not count and are not observed during the hours of  Brunch.

  6. Awesome Fu*king Friends

    If you do not have awesome fu*king friends, keep drinking No. 1 and No. 3 until your friends or company becomes fu*cking awesome.

  7. Mimosas

    In the event No. 1 was dismissed or skipped, here is a reminder.

  8. 90s Rap

    Perhaps you prefer something else?  Nickelback?  Creed?  No.  Not at brunch.  Blast Biggie and enjoy some nostalgia rhymes with your mimosa.  Here is a brief playlist:

    1. Notorious BIG – Big Poppa
    2. Warren G – Regulate
    3. Notorious BIG – Juicy
    4. Luniz – I Got 5 On It
    5. Notorious BIG – Hypnotize
    6. Notorious BIG – Mo Money Mo Problems
    7. Warren G – Regulate
    8. Tupac – California Love
    9. Snoop Dogg – Gin & Juice
  9. Soul Food

    Biscuits & Gravy.  Chicken & Waffles.  Grits.  Yes.  Yes. And yes.

  10. Lunch (I guess?)

    Lunch on the menu is like the red-headed step-child of the family portrait.  Sure, it’s part of the family but it really sticks out.

  11. Sunglasses & Advil

    You’ll need these for the following morning.  Trust me.

 

What did I miss?

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